There is Still Time: How 'I Saw the TV Glow' Illuminates Trans Experiences

Forget Emilia Pérez, this is the 2024 film representation we deserve

Worlds Apart from the Mainstream

Given the year we're having, with trans identity being attacked on all fronts, it only made sense to see the Oscar-winning team behind Emilia Pérez – a film nominally about trans issues, even if it came off as lazy at best – say not a single word to or about the trans community during their acceptance speeches. But that's been talked to death already.

Today I want to recommend another film, starring two queer actors and envisioned by a trans director, which attempts to convey a part of the trans experience to its audience. I Saw the TV Glow is a strange, beautiful piece of art that I hope you'll consider watching if you haven't already.

It's labelled as horror, but not for any overwhelming gore or jump scares; the horror is partly atmospheric but mostly arises from the very real emotions the film and characters manage to convey. So beware on that front!

I'm going to get into spoilers below, so again consider seeing the film first before reading ahead (here's a tool to check where it's streaming in your country). Without further ado, let's enter the Pink Opaque.

Official Trailer (A24)

Weird Fiction

If you've read many of my posts on writing & narrative, you'll know I love stories that ask me to question my basic assumptions about a world and/or introduce me to new ideas for how to tell stories. One film I've previously written about for this reason and which lives in my head rent-free is The Lobster, probably my favourite Lanthimos film alongside Poor Things. Another is I'm Thinking of Ending Things, which probably deserves its own look eventually.

I Saw the TV Glow maintains a similarly strange atmosphere throughout, but mainly caught my fascination (on this front) with a brilliant one-two punch. The film is about teenage Owen & Maddy's love of a TV show called 'The Pink Opaque', which sees two friends contending with psychedelic supernatural entities each week. The show and its character designs are wonderfully absurd – which makes it all the more poignant when Maddy later tries to convince Owen that The Pink Opaque is their real world, and that this life is a prison imposed on them by the show's antagonist Mr. Melancholy.

Even before we get into the trans allegory in a moment, I found this to be an incredible narrative twist. Inception played a little with the idea of questioning reality, but I find this film hits me a lot harder when the viewer has such a sense of Owen's longing and dedication to the show and its world. Its hazy, dream-like nature makes the question even more surreal, evoking the moment you wake up from a dream and struggle to decide what's real.

Owen has spent his life feeling alienated and uncomfortable in his own skin – doubly so since Maddy's disappearance and The Pink Opaque's apparently simultaneous cancellation. Then suddenly Maddy returns and suggests another life could be his: one as a confident and able woman, in the world of his dreams. If only he would take the leap of faith.

Fan Poster by Izzy

Heartfelt Allegory

And it's terrifying! Even though Owen isn't particularly happy in his life and has seen Maddy gain assurance in accepting she's actually Tara from the show, becoming Isabel is still a gut-wrenching prospect. It would mean sacrificing everything, and even in the best case scenario he would be consigning himself to constant struggles with Mr. Melancholy and his henchmen.

(Hopefully the trans imagery is fairly clear, but to state it outright: By embracing a trans identity and transitioning, Owen would be risking all current relationships and be consigned to a lifetime of hate and discrimination – just for the chance to live a happier, truer, more fulfilling life.)

He ultimately can't take the leap. Maddy/Tara disappears apparently forever, and in the final scene we see him twenty years in the future – still at the same miserable job, invisible and bent under the weight of his life. But we also see that he still remembers The Pink Opaque with fondness.

With the final line, we're reminded that "there is still time" – a line from Maddy and a promise that even though you might have been happier to take the leap long ago, now is the next best chance you're going to get.

Fan Poster by Aleks Phoenix

There is Still Time

It's a brutally emotional ending, to say the least. It truly struck home for me, not just in terms of my gender identity but also for the years I feel I've lost to undiagnosed ADHD and social anxiety. Thankfully, it's just a film: whether Owen finally takes the leap or not, his life is his own. Just as mine is mine and yours is yours. So whatever it is, there is still time.

Also, huge kudos to queer lead actors Jack Haven and Justice Smith, who killed it despite the odd choice to have them speak in an uncomfortable monotone throughout. I already praised The Pink Opaque's visuals but the whole film was beautiful too.

Anyway, thanks for reading and until next time <3