How Speculative Fiction has helped me navigate social anxiety.
“The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown” - A Racist
How many hours of my ‘carefree’ teenage years did I spend isolated in the thorny clutches of anxiety and depression? Was it more than most? Merely different in form, a climbing and crashing wave instead of staccato thunderclaps?
My peers always seemed so blissfully open to new people, places, and experiences; to the point that I struggle to envision what role anxiety actually played for some of them. They could walk unprepared into the unknown with confidence. On the rare occasions I was dragged kicking and screaming into that void, it was only after endless stomach-churning procrastination and deliberation.
Serapio (by @zei-ord-art) from Black Sun by Rebecca Roanhorse
My approach to books and movies stands in sharp contrast to that fear of the unknown: when I’m already committed to enjoying a piece of media, I avoid trailers and back-of-book blurbs like the plague.
“But… How do you know you will like it?” You wisely ask.
Well, often I’m relying on recommendations and ratings from people I trust - hopefully you can trust me in turn! Other times, I find myself reading hot garbage that the uncritical internet thought was pretty: *cough cough* The Fourth Wing, Before the Coffee gets Cold, *cough cough*. Sometimes you just have to give up on a book.
Chinese cover for The Library at Mount Char by Scott Hawkins
I treasure the experience of diving headlong into the imaginations of brilliant speculative fiction creators. Taking a similar blind plunge into a non-fiction work will snap your neck: no matter how beautiful the structure, it will lack the room to be fully immersive. The same is true of most fiction. Comedy, romance or thriller, convention dictates that 99.9% of the real world’s logic will apply.
Isn’t the appeal of those works so often that 0.1%? The absurdist moment in comedy, the perfect meet-cute in romance, the ingenious murderer in mystery, the ever-rising tension which defines a thriller. We love when stories are elevated with a hint of the surreal.
For me, that spark of interest is nearly impossible to kindle through endless exposition. There are countless Young Adult fantasy books explaining every unique aspect of their world early, so that the reader can focus on mind-numbing love triangle #643,195. They do nothing for me, because they expect nothing of me.
The Lobster, Directed by Yorgos Lanthimos
My understanding of speculative fiction has recently expanded to include absurdist (often dark) comedy films and TV. The Lobster (2015), What We Do In The Shadows (2014), and Preacher (2016-2019) are a few examples of media that will be near incomprehensible to an audience used to being spoon-fed soap operas and procedural mysteries.
You have to work to navigate The Lobster, inventing theories and discarding them with each new surreal element. In The Library at Mount Char, trying to take things at face value will leave you irretrievably lost: yes Carolyn is an American librarian in her late twenties, no none of that helpfully encompasses her.
In my preliminary book recommendations post, I chose Piranesi to exemplify these types of stories because it forces you to abandon your preconceptions. There aren’t any familiar context clues, so sit back and enjoy the ride.
Art for Susannah Clark’s Piranesi by Seth T. Hahne
Surreal speculative fiction stories have taught me to enjoy the process of learning and familiarizing myself with the unknown. Real life situations are chaotic, especially when socialization is involved. You can’t approach a dinner event as a linear experience, you have to go with the flow.
Great speculative fiction will provide clues and context that aren’t immediately helpful, but have fascinating implications all the same. Mark Lawrence’s Red Sister is about a school of assassin-nuns in a fantasy world with hereditary magic, yet casually hints early on that humans traveled through the void in order to reach these ‘shores’. It is foreshadowing, but it also feels like a deep and ominous piece of worldbuilding in the moment.
In sharp contrast are some moments in the Alex Stern novels by Leigh Bardugo. I love these books, but the bestselling YA author often can’t have her characters stumble across a new idea just in time for it to be plot relevant.
‘Sisters of Sweet Mercy’ by banishedshadow
These stories have helped me embrace the chaos of the new and unfamiliar. It’s impossible to fully grasp any real world situation, but you can work with the context clues you find to build a strong understanding. The same is true of Mount Char, The Lobster, and so many other immersive and surreal stories.
Let me know if any of this resonates! Thanks for reading, and check back soon for more.
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